Soy's here, and soy's queer.

WorldNetDaily is widely acknowledged to be America's most trustworthy source of medical, spiritual and sexual guidance, as proven by the fact that Chuck Norris writes for them (Take that, Le Monde). Therefore, it is with the utmost manful urgency that I bring unto you this eye-opening article on the link between soy consumption and homofabulosity. The startling truth is that if you connect the dots, the lines connecting the dots spell out "Soy makes you gay".

Is WorldNetDaily exaggerating the gravity of this latest threat posed to American men's heterosexuality? If you think so, the following should set you straight, so to speak. Given what my research has demonstrated about our limp-wristed 11th President, this daguerreotype photo taken in a 19th-century soybean field is all the proof we need of soy's feminizing effects.